You know you have CF when…

This was recently posted on CysticLife, a forum I follow for Cystic Fibrosis.  It struck me funny and wanted to share.  I did remove some that didn’t apply to me and tweaked a few to apply more so to me.

*You do a happy dance when you hack up a huge wad of mucus, show your hubby, and he gives you a congratulatory high five.
*You know more medical terms by the age of ten than most people know their whole lives.
*You have your pharmacist, family doctor, CF doctor, transplant doctor, endocrinologist, ENT that you always use, home supply company and your medical insurance company as numbers 1-10 on your cell phone's speed dial.
*You have multiple scars from PICC lines, IVs and other 'experimentations' as the doctors like to call them.
*You are so used to getting your blood drawn that you are the proverbial 'test dummy' for all the new nurses fresh out of college - you don't mind, do ya?
*You have antibacterial gel in your purse, in your car, on the kitchen counter, in the bathroom, in your friend's dorm, in their car - hell everywhere!
*You can instruct the nurses how to work the IV machine at the hospital.
*You have also learned who your real friends are because most people can't take the pressure of being around a person who has CF.
*You make people wince on a daily basis because of the sound of your cough.
*The checkout lady at Target has confidently told you that she just got over whatever I have and Theraflu worked for her, which you calmly say, 'I will be sure to try that.'
*You can sleep through anything - you perfected the skill by being shaken by your Vest all of these years.
*You are a multi-tasker by need. While you're doing your Vest you MUST: eat breakfast, do your nebulizers, work, play with the dogs and have a conversation with your hubby about the days plans all at once or it would never get done.
*You learn by the age of 15 that life is a gift and most people don't see it's pretty paper.
*You have used your Vest multiple times as a torment device for your dog by blowing air at him and watching him try to catch it in his mouth, entertainment device for kids because a shaking vest is a fun 'toy' and a laughing tool for adults when you try to talk to keep up with the conversation, even on the maximum setting. (SO TRUE)
*Many adults have commented to you that you are very wise/mature for your age.
*You feel as if there is ALWAYS someone worse off than you somewhere.
*You are more scared of losing your loved ones, family and friends than you are of dying yourself.
*When dogs and babies lick your ever-so salty skin.
*After working out, or just being in the heat, you have a visible film of salt covering your entire body.
*You look at food labels and say things like, "Sweet! 600 calories per serving!"
*You are so tired of people saying "have another smoke!" after you finish a coughing fit, and you wonder if they are worth the real explanation.
*You have an extra dessert and everyone wonders where you put it, because it sure doesn't go to your hips!
*You make sure you don't go to the bathroom BEFORE you get weighed at clinic - every ounce counts!